Byte Data from Ricky's brain

Healthy Parenting

Today is the first day that Crystal and me going for a parenting class. We got to know about this parenting class from HOPE Worldwide Malaysia from their website: http://www.hopeww.org.my/gep. When I got the news about this class, immediately I am signing up with Crystal, and we are making sure that both of us able to attend this class. I love the lesson so much, it really teaches me about how to become healthy parenting rather than being a competent one. There are a lot of new things that I learn from today’s workshop and so far below are some personal summary points that I took from the workshop.

Putting More Effort on Relationship, not Behavior Correction

As a parent, it is easy to correct our kids when they are not behaving as what we expected, or perhaps not in a proper manner. Why did I say easy? Because you can take many ways to discipline your kids, such as punishment, verbal correction, etc. But when it comes to relationship matters, it takes significant effort and time to build, not to mention it needs to be done in a lifetime. What I learned is that when my relationship with my kid is deep enough, conveying my message to him is more comfortable. Because they will listen to guidance well. This point really blows my mind as it really does open my horizon as a parent. I want my kid to be successful (who does not??). But the questions will be how well I can get close with my son in every stage of his life.

The speaker brings good insight, many parenting books, the majority emphasizes correcting kids’ behavior. Such as how to make kids listen to you, how to teach them discipline, well, the list goes on. Not many emphasize more on how healthy relationships between parents and children. As a parent, it is common to have a misconception that your relationship is always good, but probably the right question is, what are you nurturing them well? Build a healthy environment around them to ensure they can make the right decision on their own? If you have such questions and looking for an answer, perhaps you might find one from ‘Good enough parenting’ book.

Best gift to children is an excellent marriage

Yes!! Best give to children is an excellent marriage. I have miss-conception about providing the best gift. When I look at my childhood, I always see my father work really hard to bring food on the table, clothes, and educations for me and my siblings. My mom still compares me with my brother and sister, to the point I become numb about it (My brother and sister are well-doing students while mine always gives them a heart attack). One thing that I remember clearly, I seldom see my family having a heart to heart conversation often. Not to mention having an in-depth talk between my parents and me, which is why I find an alternative, which is video games.

I would probably repeat the parenting model from my parents to my kids if I did not attend this workshop. Basically, I will be creating my own self to my son. Coming out from class tonight, it makes me determined to break the circle about parenting model. I decided that I will try my best to create a healthy family environment for my kid, and it start with a great marriage. I really thank God that I can attend such a great workshop.

If you are reading this and hoping to share your great experience or exchange knowledge, make comment on this post.

1 Comment

  1. Consistent Weekly Spending Time - Byte Data from Ricky's brain

    30/08/2019 at 11:51 PM

    […] You would not get the benefit after doing it one time. Cultivate this habit and slowly if you observe your children they will have changes (some children take a longer time, but that is ok. Make sure to keep doing it). You can also do some activity together, remember the focus is to build a relationship. I notice now my son listen more to what I told him. In the past, I have to keep repeating and tend to discipline him due to this. Apart from listening to me, he is often trying to find me instead of keep attached to my wife. The best part is that, when we play together, we really have lots of fun. I always keep reminding me that I need to aim to be a healthy parent, not competent. […]

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